Adoption Decisions, Page 3

The following are reasons people choose transracial adoption:

Humanitarian
In considering adoption, most people quickly learn that there are few white babies available for adoption and many bi-racial and African American. Some prospective parents are deeply troubled by this and decide that because all children have an equal right to a loving home, they will adopt transracially.

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Community
Although some prospective adoptive parents live in communities in which it would be very difficult to adopt transracially, others do not. For those who are part of neighborhoods and/or religious groups that welcome and celebrate diversity, transracial adoption feels natural and comfortable.

Availability
Eager to be parents, some individuals and couples will opt for transracial adoption because of the time frame. Unwilling--or reluctant--to postpone parenting (especially if they are older), they will decide to pursue a transracial adoption, anticipating that it can be completed in a brief time frame. If you are considering transracial adoption for this reason, remember that you are making a decision for the rest of your life--and the life of the child. It is a very BIG decision that should not be made for reasons of expediency.

"Do we want to adopt an infant or an older child?

The following are reasons that people choose infant adoption:

Bonding and Attachment
Respectful of importance of early attachments, many prospective adoptive parents feel most comfortable seeking an infant. They anticipate that they and their child will bond easily.

The Significance of Environment
Although much is "nature", much is also "nurture." Many prospective adoptive parents want to minimize the possibility of other early environmental influences on their child. They feel more comfortable knowing it is their "nurture" right from the beginning.

Loss
Aware that any adoptee experiences loss, parents choosing infant adoption feel that they are minimizing the dimensions of loss. And there are personal losses to consider as well. When you have missed out on pregnancy, labor and delivery, it often feels very important to be with your child as soon as possible. With infant adoption in this country, adoptive parents are often in the delivery room. And although it is challenging, some adoptive mothers nurse their infants (almost always with supplemental feedings).

The following are reasons that people choose to adopt an older child:

Altruism
Aware that an older child is much less likely to find a home, prospective adoptive parents will consider an older child.

Access
Because it is more difficult to adopt an infant, families will decide on an older child. This is especially true for those who fear that they will have difficulty--perhaps because of their ages--adopting an infant.

Health
Some prospective adoptive parents are frightened by the medical unknowns that accompany any newborn into the world. While anyone's medical situation can change at any point, adopting an older child offers parents the opportunity to rule out retardation and severe physical and mental disabilities. However, if you are choosing to adopt an older child for these reasons, it is important to remember that older children often come with significant emotional scars.

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