Making the Psychological Transition to Adoptive Parenthood

Before You Adopt
Common Issues Among Adoptive Parents
Distance Learning Offers New Options for Adoption Preparation
Making the Psychological Transition to Adoptive Parenthood
Twelve Skills for Successful Fostering and Adopting

You Don't Have to be Perfect and Other Adoption Myths

Pick a pediatrician/family practitioner

Pick a developmental pediatrician/expert with post-institution child (PIC)

Have child's medical files/videotape reviewed before taking referral

Set up community resource network before you go; contact county special child health services, child study team, occupational therapist, mature babysitter/respite caregiver, parents who've already adopted

Join a support group for adoptive families from your source (see our adoption resources)

Prepare family members for adoption-related issues to help them transition to adopted relatives

Prepare the baby/child's room

Buy the necessary equipment (toys should be suitable for children below the chronological age of child from institution (don't overstimulate)

Talk with your clergy (acceptance of adopted child/family)

Learn how to parent (it's not innate)--replace reward and punishment method and learn basic filial therapy techniques

Read adoption literature specific to orphanage impact; attend workshops; join organizations (see our articles and books on adoption and adoption resources)

How will your role change? How will your time be used?

What new chores will you have? What assistance will you need?

If you're married, how will you determine who does what tasks?

How will your marriage change? What are you willing to let go of for a while? What do you need to hold onto for sanity?

You deserve a baby/child shower, too!

Freeze food now; adopting is just as (maybe more) exhausting as giving birth

Set up support network with family and friends before you leave (who can give you respite to take a shower, sleep, eat in the initial few weeks)

Find a babysitter with experience with a difficult child

REMEMBER, BEING PREPARED HELPS TO ESTABLISH REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS AND NECESSARY TOOLS TO AVOID POST-ADOPTION DEPRESSION AND RESENTMENT OF ADOPTED CHILD

Credits: Adoption Resource Center
Jewish Family Service of Southern Middlesex County
517 Ryders Lane
East Brunswick, NJ 08816
(908) 257-4100