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Making the Psychological Transition to Adoptive Parenthood

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  • Pick a pediatrician/family practitioner
  • Pick a developmental pediatrician/expert with post-institution child (PIC)
  • Have child's medical files/videotape reviewed before taking referral
  • Set up community resource network before you go; contact county special child health services, child study team, occupational therapist, mature babysitter/respite caregiver, parents who've already adopted
  • Join a support group for adoptive families from your source (see our adoption resources)
  • Prepare family members for adoption-related issues to help them transition to adopted relatives
  • Prepare the baby/child's room
  • Buy the necessary equipment (toys should be suitable for children below the chronological age of child from institution (don't overstimulate)
  • Talk with your clergy (acceptance of adopted child/family)
  • Learn how to parent (it's not innate)--replace reward and punishment method and learn basic filial therapy techniques
  • Read adoption literature specific to orphanage impact; attend workshops; join organizations (see our articles and books on adoption and adoption resources)
  • How will your role change? How will your time be used?
  • What new chores will you have? What assistance will you need?
  • If you're married, how will you determine who does what tasks?
  • How will your marriage change? What are you willing to let go of for a while? What do you need to hold onto for sanity?
  • You deserve a baby/child shower, too!
  • Freeze food now; adopting is just as (maybe more) exhausting as giving birth
  • Set up support network with family and friends before you leave (who can give you respite to take a shower, sleep, eat in the initial few weeks)
  • Find a babysitter with experience with a difficult child
REMEMBER, BEING PREPARED HELPS TO ESTABLISH REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS AND NECESSARY TOOLS TO AVOID POST-ADOPTION DEPRESSION AND RESENTMENT OF ADOPTED CHILD

Credits: Adoption Resource Center
Jewish Family Service of Southern Middlesex County
517 Ryders Lane
East Brunswick, NJ 08816
(908) 257-4100

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A is 4 Adoption logo
Adoption is a courageous act of love. Why A is 4 Adoption? We are a "hands on" organization with a passion for creating families. Let us take the worry out of your adoption.  [more]
A is 4 Adoption (visit website)
(714) 556-0220, (866) 569-2229

Southwest Adoption Nexus logo
October 2, 2010 Spend the day with leading adoption professionals. Learn everything to know on domestic and international adoption options. Hear from adoptive families, adult adoptees and birth parents. Register on line: www.southwestadoption.org  [more]
Southwest Adoption Nexus (visit website)
(661) 435-1223, Fax (661) 362-4100

Adoption Network Law Center logo
ANLC is a leading adoption legal practice, specializing in domestic newborn adoptions, and provides service throughout the US. ANLC works with an extensive network of adoption professionals in the US to ensure all involved parties are advised of all aspects of the adoption process.  [more]
Adoption Network Law Center (visit website)
(800) 367-2367
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